Cindy
*sigh* ud know this if u read the silmarillion...
- Joined
- Feb 28, 2018
- Messages
- 2,263
- Nebulae
- 7,555
continuation of this:
im a tad tispy right now which means its time for me to rant over something that probably doesn't need to be ranted over but im absolutely ready to make a big deal out of something small for at least 2 minutes of your time and ten minutes of mine as i slap my fingers against my keyboard. buckle ur seatbelts.
i recently had an internet outage that lasted 36 hours and out of my own boredom i decided to play through the hl2 games again simply because it was all that i had installed on my new computer and i also like to take the time to refresh myself with the original material for the sake of replay value. there's always shit i miss, new things i notice, etc. even after so many years of playing this game and roleplaying in its universe.
my kettle is hissing. my mug is ready. the tea is warm. i sit in my armchair.
and before i proceed, let me portray my thanks to the map making community of gmod and specifically the map makers who dedicate their time to making atmospheric and enjoyable roleplay mediums for the roleplayers of gmod. bless ur hearts. i love you. i blow you a kiss. mwuah.
now let's talk about how the map-making community is 99% fucking clueless on what an actual sewer looks like.
there's this really weird following of people that make maps who decide to sculpt entire undercities as opposed to anything that resembles a sewer. i think the only maps in hl2rp ive seen mock up a realistic sewer are city 2, terminal six and city 24. hell, industrial 17's sewer is so goddamn awful its runoff literally flows upwards into the beach. i can at least give it credit to having the storm drain that's right outside the cybercafe that at least is somewhat reminiscent of a sewer, but why the fuck is there a cybercafe at the bottom of a storm drain.
about a year ago i finally narrowed down the source of this obscene handiwork when I was running through hl2 again. in the Route Kanal chapter, I noticed that the canals (note the underline) looked very similar to the "sewers" often portrayed in hl2rp maps. people have been mish-mashing their barebones understanding of sewage and plumbing with that of a canal.
and today, to add to the very top of this shit pile, I was near the end of the first hl2 game to notice that, during the uprising phase when you shut down the generator, there's a bridge that's been knocked down and you have to find another way around. this prompts alyx to do her "LET ME SEE IF I CAN FIX THIS" shenanigans where she sits there and does a big fat think while she implies that you're the one that actually has to find the way around and leaves you to do this alone. fucking alyx.
this turn of events leads you into an actual sewer. no, not a canal. not the botched up hl2rp impression of a canal. an actual fucking sewer. a place were some radioactive reptiles and jackie chan's pet rat can eat pizza together. so not only have people been taking the route kanal chapter as reference to build their fucking SEWERS, they've completely ignored the fact that there is an actual fucking sewer (that even has a real STORM DRAIN) in the base game that only ONE MAP (c17_build210) has even used a piece of. and they didnt even use the actual sewer part, just the portion that leads up to it.
the sewers portrayed in d47, i17 and c17build can technically be counted as sewers but that's literally a form of arcitecture that is only used in specific places of the world and is absolutely alien to post-soviet block eastern europe.
in conclusion: fuck you for not meeting my obnoxiously and unrealistically high margin of realism that i demand from people that spend months to years of their life to make maps from a god awful and painfully mindwrenching 90s quake engine for a demanding prepubescent community of sexy tiddy combine assassin larpers.
thank you for coming to my ted talk.
i sleep.
i dont trust another mapper to meet my outrageous demands even if i were to give them a small loan of a million dollars. i either bleed from my eyes for months and years or i take my mapping aspirations to my grave.
im a tad tispy right now which means its time for me to rant over something that probably doesn't need to be ranted over but im absolutely ready to make a big deal out of something small for at least 2 minutes of your time and ten minutes of mine as i slap my fingers against my keyboard. buckle ur seatbelts.
i recently had an internet outage that lasted 36 hours and out of my own boredom i decided to play through the hl2 games again simply because it was all that i had installed on my new computer and i also like to take the time to refresh myself with the original material for the sake of replay value. there's always shit i miss, new things i notice, etc. even after so many years of playing this game and roleplaying in its universe.
my kettle is hissing. my mug is ready. the tea is warm. i sit in my armchair.
and before i proceed, let me portray my thanks to the map making community of gmod and specifically the map makers who dedicate their time to making atmospheric and enjoyable roleplay mediums for the roleplayers of gmod. bless ur hearts. i love you. i blow you a kiss. mwuah.
now let's talk about how the map-making community is 99% fucking clueless on what an actual sewer looks like.
there's this really weird following of people that make maps who decide to sculpt entire undercities as opposed to anything that resembles a sewer. i think the only maps in hl2rp ive seen mock up a realistic sewer are city 2, terminal six and city 24. hell, industrial 17's sewer is so goddamn awful its runoff literally flows upwards into the beach. i can at least give it credit to having the storm drain that's right outside the cybercafe that at least is somewhat reminiscent of a sewer, but why the fuck is there a cybercafe at the bottom of a storm drain.
about a year ago i finally narrowed down the source of this obscene handiwork when I was running through hl2 again. in the Route Kanal chapter, I noticed that the canals (note the underline) looked very similar to the "sewers" often portrayed in hl2rp maps. people have been mish-mashing their barebones understanding of sewage and plumbing with that of a canal.
and today, to add to the very top of this shit pile, I was near the end of the first hl2 game to notice that, during the uprising phase when you shut down the generator, there's a bridge that's been knocked down and you have to find another way around. this prompts alyx to do her "LET ME SEE IF I CAN FIX THIS" shenanigans where she sits there and does a big fat think while she implies that you're the one that actually has to find the way around and leaves you to do this alone. fucking alyx.
this turn of events leads you into an actual sewer. no, not a canal. not the botched up hl2rp impression of a canal. an actual fucking sewer. a place were some radioactive reptiles and jackie chan's pet rat can eat pizza together. so not only have people been taking the route kanal chapter as reference to build their fucking SEWERS, they've completely ignored the fact that there is an actual fucking sewer (that even has a real STORM DRAIN) in the base game that only ONE MAP (c17_build210) has even used a piece of. and they didnt even use the actual sewer part, just the portion that leads up to it.
the sewers portrayed in d47, i17 and c17build can technically be counted as sewers but that's literally a form of arcitecture that is only used in specific places of the world and is absolutely alien to post-soviet block eastern europe.
in conclusion: fuck you for not meeting my obnoxiously and unrealistically high margin of realism that i demand from people that spend months to years of their life to make maps from a god awful and painfully mindwrenching 90s quake engine for a demanding prepubescent community of sexy tiddy combine assassin larpers.
thank you for coming to my ted talk.
i sleep.
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