Serious Medical/Mental Illness. Or a general well being thread

[Sil]

I know the feeling. It fucking sucks.

This summer is the loneliest I've been. I've went out with friends a couple times but when my girlfriend broke up with me I didn't use my phone for 2 days straight and I missed nothing. I talk with guys online but when they're not around I just don't really know who to talk to, what to do, et ecetera. It sucks.

I do not know how to fix it.

If you're able to, there'll always be places around that can help you find new people to call friends.

Having a single group/person to dedicate yourself to in a friendship can become socially exhausting, as there's only so much you can say to someone before you either repeat yourself or the conversations become more tiresome over enjoyable. Social batteries can easily run out, but something you don't hear as much is how you can experience a social burnout with people, making your social battery always low around them, at least for a time.

Games shops were how I did it. I'm also still in education, so I'll have a fair stream of people in my life that I can make friends with if I want to. If you're not able to access either, then (and I understand if this is a bit of an odd choice) most churches are welcoming and accepting of people looking for community. Though obviously that's more from anecdotal experience than actual advice, as I don't know what your living circumstances are like and what you might have access to.

 

[Deleted member 22]

open your discord to friend requests rq

Sorted, opened I think. Very bad with tech

 

[Bruzzo]

And come Christmas and New Years, you feel more alone than ever.

Somedays, if not many days, you look back into the past where you acted irrationally, and find yourself struggling in an endless thought loop of hopelessness, and guilt, but all you wanted was good.

Why would you be bothered by being alone? I don't understand how so many people complain about being alone like it's a thorn in the flank. Why don't you just make yourself likable and join a social group if you don't like being alone?

 

[MaXenzie]

Why would you be bothered by being alone? I don't understand how so many people complain about being alone like it's a thorn in the flank. Why don't you just make yourself likable and join a social group if you don't like being alone?

being alone =/= feeling alone

you can be surrounded by people, and still be lonely

 

[Zarail]

kinda shitty to post bait in a mental health thread, ngl.

 

[Zeenz]

Why would you be bothered by being alone? I don't understand how so many people complain about being alone like it's a thorn in the flank. Why don't you just make yourself likable and join a social group if you don't like being alone?

-snip-

It’s fine to ask question but don’t be a dick about it man, you don’t know what someone is going through. This type of shit is why some people never open up, I rather have a mate come to me saying he fees alone then me having to go to his funeral.

 

[Bruzzo]

It’s fine to ask question but don’t be a dick about it man, you don’t know what someone is going through. This type of shit is why some people never open up, I rather have a mate come to me saying he fees alone then me having to go to his funeral.

still don't get it

 

[dallahan]

still don't get it

smooth brain

 

[Zeenz]

still don't get it

Your most likely trolling but ima treat this as a teaching moment. ONE don’t enter a mental health thread being a dick end of man, show humility yeah?
Second here are some videos which may help you:




It’s ok to ask questions but show respect ok?

 

[Clokr]

Why would you be bothered by being alone? I don't understand how so many people complain about being alone like it's a thorn in the flank. Why don't you just make yourself likable and join a social group if you don't like being alone?

For alot of people. Isolation is the main killer of many a folk. I'm not gonna rag on you like others I'll give the benefit of the doubt.

But mental illness especially depression and anxiety today keeps a whole lot of people out of the general thought of wanting to socialize. Like myself personally even now when I go out in public with like my partner I will almost quite literally get sick physically because my brain messes with me emotionally to such that point.

While I can agree in what you're getting at that the only ones who can help is yourself, it's really fucking hard for people going through these times in their lives to understand much of anything at all. I was the same, saw help in the way of more harm then good then after bettering myself saw how it was for how it could be.

Don't feel bad bout yourself or dislike others for what they say here man. Idk you and probably that's a good thing. We all got our shit and lashing out in a place where I made it so people could just be themselves and not try and put up a farce so others of the like could jump in in a situation similar to help em out.

 

[Zeenz]

For alot of people. Isolation is the main killer of many a folk. I'm not gonna rag on you like others I'll give the benefit of the doubt.

But mental illness especially depression and anxiety today keeps a whole lot of people out of the general thought of wanting to socialize. Like myself personally even now when I go out in public with like my partner I will almost quite literally get sick physically because my brain messes with me emotionally to such that point.

While I can agree in what you're getting at that the only ones who can help is yourself, it's really fucking hard for people going through these times in their lives to understand much of anything at all. I was the same, saw help in the way of more harm then good then after bettering myself saw how it was for how it could be.

Don't feel bad bout yourself or dislike others for what they say here man. Idk you and probably that's a good thing. We all got our shit and lashing out in a place where I made it so people could just be themselves and not try and put up a farce so others of the like could jump in in a situation similar to help em out.

It wasn’t the fact he was asking the question why people got mad I think like i said it’s a teachable moment, it’s the fact that he called it retarded implying both the situation plus the person going through it is retarded, it’s always fine to ask questions. Just never enter it with that type of attitude

 

[Bruzzo]

For alot of people. Isolation is the main killer of many a folk. I'm not gonna rag on you like others I'll give the benefit of the doubt.

But mental illness especially depression and anxiety today keeps a whole lot of people out of the general thought of wanting to socialize. Like myself personally even now when I go out in public with like my partner I will almost quite literally get sick physically because my brain messes with me emotionally to such that point.

While I can agree in what you're getting at that the only ones who can help is yourself, it's really fucking hard for people going through these times in their lives to understand much of anything at all. I was the same, saw help in the way of more harm then good then after bettering myself saw how it was for how it could be.

Don't feel bad bout yourself or dislike others for what they say here man. Idk you and probably that's a good thing. We all got our shit and lashing out in a place where I made it so people could just be themselves and not try and put up a farce so others of the like could jump in in a situation similar to help em out.

I appreciate that, man. Best wishes.

 

[Nov]

Completely unrelated to he disccusion of before but I found myself recently at crossroads with my own thoughts and feelings.

What I am currently going through is something I could loosely describe as a phase of self-discovery and I don't know how to feel about it.
Self-discovery in many things including but not limited to my view on the world and society, and that it is completely fine to be alone.

It started in Summer when I started slowly disconnecting myself with what I would call "virtual obligations", things that I would usually do because I think they are necessary or I feel the need to do them, not necessarily addictions but things I do regularly that I could stop at any time I wanted to.
During that time I discovered a few things and questions that would've otherwise never made any tangible sense to me before.

One of such things was the general appreciation of the minute things and the imperfect.
I took on to talking to people more often and not the kind that I would usually frequent, whenever it wasn't awkward.
This came to be when I was facing struggles that I shared with a large group, be it traffic difficulties or perhaps other things.
It was also then that I came to appreciate that there is more to life than keeping yourself in limited circles, discovering viewing points of other people and just generally listening.
Imperfection, especially unfinished things came to me as something rather unpleasant before.
I always thought it to be crucial to finish anything and everything I did, but over the course of this summer I learned to appreciate that spacing out work or art that you indulge yourself in, can be a bliss.
Not only that, but it also left room to learning and observation of what you have accomplished or could accomplish.
What truely beckoned me to this was art primarily, which flowed over in some aspects in my life where they wouldn't cause damage but rather leave room for other things.

All the while it came to me that those obligations in life placed me under some form of expectance, a deadline, a form of stress which came to me as a relief once I distanced myself from those, not in all but in many things that I would consider an obligation otherwise.

At the moment I have reached a certain form of peace of mind despite living in a largely chaotic world.


Has anyone else experienced some form of discovery?

 

[Ond]

Completely unrelated to he disccusion of before but I found myself recently at crossroads with my own thoughts and feelings.

What I am currently going through is something I could loosely describe as a phase of self-discovery and I don't know how to feel about it.
Self-discovery in many things including but not limited to my view on the world and society, and that it is completely fine to be alone.

It started in Summer when I started slowly disconnecting myself with what I would call "virtual obligations", things that I would usually do because I think they are necessary or I feel the need to do them, not necessarily addictions but things I do regularly that I could stop at any time I wanted to.
During that time I discovered a few things and questions that would've otherwise never made any tangible sense to me before.

One of such things was the general appreciation of the minute things and the imperfect.
I took on to talking to people more often and not the kind that I would usually frequent, whenever it wasn't awkward.
This came to be when I was facing struggles that I shared with a large group, be it traffic difficulties or perhaps other things.
It was also then that I came to appreciate that there is more to life than keeping yourself in limited circles, discovering viewing points of other people and just generally listening.
Imperfection, especially unfinished things came to me as something rather unpleasant before.
I always thought it to be crucial to finish anything and everything I did, but over the course of this summer I learned to appreciate that spacing out work or art that you indulge yourself in, can be a bliss.
Not only that, but it also left room to learning and observation of what you have accomplished or could accomplish.
What truely beckoned me to this was art primarily, which flowed over in some aspects in my life where they wouldn't cause damage but rather leave room for other things.

All the while it came to me that those obligations in life placed me under some form of expectance, a deadline, a form of stress which came to me as a relief once I distanced myself from those, not in all but in many things that I would consider an obligation otherwise.

At the moment I have reached a certain form of peace of mind despite living in a largely chaotic world.


Has anyone else experienced some form of discovery?

You’re slowly finding out that its okay to do nothing and be fine with it

And that most things aren’t that deep, or worth the concern - as far as I can tell, right?

 

[Nov]

You’re slowly finding out that its okay to do nothing and be fine with it

And that most things aren’t that deep, or worth the concern - as far as I can tell, right?

in the essence

 

[Ond]

in the essence

Welcome to adulthood, lol

The beginning of becoming your own person

 

[Zeenz]

Welcome to adulthood, lol

The beginning of becoming your own person

The secret is, no one has it 100% figured out. No one knows the meaning of life. you never will. that's because it doesn't exist in a mathematical equation, it will never be tied to a fact. But its simple, life is what you make it. The meaning of life Is you, you are it. Congratulations! Enjoy the world for what it is, a snapshot of eternity, the time you existed. Yes a speckle of dust in the magnitude of space, but unlike art or movies or everything, you are still unique, never copied again.

tldr, welcome to never 100% understanding life and meaning, that is ok, that is expected.

--
aka, nihilism is bad, Absurdism is good : )

 

[Ond]

The secret is, no one has it 100% figured out. No one knows the meaning of life. you never will. that's because it doesn't exist in a mathematical equation, it will never be tied to a fact. But its simple, life is what you make it. The meaning of life Is you, you are it. Congratulations! Enjoy the world for what it is, a snapshot of eternity, the time you existed. Yes a speckle of dust in the magnitude of space, but unlike art or movies or everything, you are still unique, never copied again.

tldr, welcome to never 100% understanding life and meaning, that is ok, that is expected.

--
aka, nihilism is bad, Absurdism is good : )

Idc about this abstract shit i just do whats fun and dont do what sucks

 

[Zeenz]

Idc about this abstract shit i just do whats fun and dont do what sucks

essentially thats the tldr of Absurdism - as Camus once said " the only way to deal with an unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your very existence is an act of reblleion" aka life has no meaning, good, have fun with it.

 

[Deleted member 4609]

Kinda random thing to post, I don’t like sharing much about myself in this community but I felt the need to get it out of my system somewhere and I felt here would be a good place to start.

Got to open up to my Mum about crossdressing this morning, a topic I’d rather avoid much debate or spotlight on since it’s pretty sensitive but today I had a chance to wear clothes I’ve had hidden away under plentiful boxes or buried deep in my wardrobe for years in and around the house without feeling like I’ve got to hide it anymore, deny that part of me or wait for everyone to be asleep to finally explore and cover it all up by morning.

It’s still something I’m uneasy and anxious about at times, even now as I sit here at my desk. I doubt it’ll ever feel like something second nature to me or maybe one day stop being accompanied by lots of self-ridicule or critique, but given how tough things have been lately as a whole with work, home, friends and family, I’ll take this small victory with a smile.

It’s just nice to feel pretty.