>Be me
>Taking trash outside
>Decide out of pure nostalgia to take a look at the old playhouse that I played in as a kid
>Wood's rotting, bolts rusted, plastic turning yellow, but still filled with that child-like wonder.
>waitonesecond.jpg
>notice something off.
>There's a stray cat squatting in the playhouse
>ABSOLUTELYVERBOTEN.gif
>literally tell the cat "If you're still here when I come back I'm going to shoot you."
>Head inside house, go upstairs to my bedroom
>Retrieve M1 Thompson airsoft gun.
>Go full tacticool mode, adopting a tactical stance as I approach the complex, literally moving like an OTA.
>Suspect sighted
>Flip safety off
>Release a burst of 6mm plastic projectiles at 200 FPS towards the furry trespasser.
>The thing bolts it into some tropical plants.
>iwojimaintensifies.gif
>Pursue the felis catus
>Feline enemy is hiding in the bushes
>SUPPRESSING FIRE!
>More BBs strike the cat. It finally flees the property altogether.
>Mission accomplished
>tfw people take greentexts seriously and smash that dumb rating because of muh animal abuse instead ot taking clearly exaggerated stories like this with a grain of salt