hewrrra
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shitpost thread - fuck blackquill
- Thread starter Powley
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Charlie
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Powley
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Charlie
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shia
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"Hey did you guys like RDR2? I got a game that's even better if you liked that. It's called Skyrim and we just released a brand new version for the very reasonable retail price of $60. What are you waiting for pardners?"
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shia
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Powley
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shia
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"Hey did you guys like RDR2? I got a game that's even better if you liked that. It's called Skyrim and we just released a brand new version for the very reasonable retail price of $60. What are you waiting for pardners?"
"Now Pardner I asked nicely, now i'm telling you...buy Skyrim."
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cns - he/him/his
The Winner
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shia
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Khiel
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Jimbo
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>be me
>Corillius Millius
>Imperial Rogue
>Get caught stealing from a merchants safe
>Merchants brother is captain of the guard
>Jailed for 10 years
>place is filled with orcs
>everyday they keep yelling
>all day everyday just yelling at each other
>i get a cell to myself so they don't tear me apart
>months go by
>start to lose my mind from all the yelling
>becoming frailer from the lack of good food and exercise
>hear screams and explosions from the city
>the screams are starting to drown out the orcs
>they quiet down and listen to the growing screams
>suddenly it stops
>next day a naked nord gets dragged in by 12 guards
>apparently he accidentally picked up a swetroll
>resisted arrest
>killed 40 guards and burnt down half the city while resisting
>he gets thrown in with me
>he stares me up and down while the guards and orcs yell at him
>squats down
>guards look confused
>"whered he go?"
>while they run around outside the nord sharts out a lockpick
>bythedivineswhatishappening.rune
>starts picking the lock
>hes having alot of problems with it
>stops and walks over to me
>shoves the shit encrusted lockpick in my hand and points at the cell door
>not going to deny the walking nightmare
>pick the lock in seconds
>the nord hurtles out of the cell and starts punching guards
>guards go down in one hit
>crumpled helmets and chest pieces
>blood everywhere
>the orcs start screaming at a level ive never heard
>decide its better to follow one nightmare than be stuck in this one
>follow the carnage to the Nord who is standing over a chest while putting on some Daedric armour
>throws a huge purse of coins at me and nods
>follow him to the outside
>the sun and fresh air on my face is beautiful
>guards rush in from outside the gates of the prison
>the nord starts throwing fire balls like candy
>my brief feeling of happiness is crumpled as the smell of burnt flesh and heat from the flames hits my face
>this continues for quite sometime
>the nord suddenly stop throwing fireballs and reaches into his pockets
>through some sort of magic he pulls out a massive chest and throws it and it crushes the captain of the guard
>the chest springs open to revel hundred of thousands of septims
>the guards immediately stop
>stare at us both
>"you are free to go"
>the nord and i leave the city together and we arrive at a crossroad
>he pats me on the shoulder and walks away waving
>im left standing alone in the middle of nowehere
>decide to move to the mountains and make a small farm
>occasionally i see an explosion in the distance and i shudder but its always nice and quiet
>can live the rest of my life comfortably with the pouch i was given
>everythingwentbetterthanexpected.wallpainting
>Corillius Millius
>Imperial Rogue
>Get caught stealing from a merchants safe
>Merchants brother is captain of the guard
>Jailed for 10 years
>place is filled with orcs
>everyday they keep yelling
>all day everyday just yelling at each other
>i get a cell to myself so they don't tear me apart
>months go by
>start to lose my mind from all the yelling
>becoming frailer from the lack of good food and exercise
>hear screams and explosions from the city
>the screams are starting to drown out the orcs
>they quiet down and listen to the growing screams
>suddenly it stops
>next day a naked nord gets dragged in by 12 guards
>apparently he accidentally picked up a swetroll
>resisted arrest
>killed 40 guards and burnt down half the city while resisting
>he gets thrown in with me
>he stares me up and down while the guards and orcs yell at him
>squats down
>guards look confused
>"whered he go?"
>while they run around outside the nord sharts out a lockpick
>bythedivineswhatishappening.rune
>starts picking the lock
>hes having alot of problems with it
>stops and walks over to me
>shoves the shit encrusted lockpick in my hand and points at the cell door
>not going to deny the walking nightmare
>pick the lock in seconds
>the nord hurtles out of the cell and starts punching guards
>guards go down in one hit
>crumpled helmets and chest pieces
>blood everywhere
>the orcs start screaming at a level ive never heard
>decide its better to follow one nightmare than be stuck in this one
>follow the carnage to the Nord who is standing over a chest while putting on some Daedric armour
>throws a huge purse of coins at me and nods
>follow him to the outside
>the sun and fresh air on my face is beautiful
>guards rush in from outside the gates of the prison
>the nord starts throwing fire balls like candy
>my brief feeling of happiness is crumpled as the smell of burnt flesh and heat from the flames hits my face
>this continues for quite sometime
>the nord suddenly stop throwing fireballs and reaches into his pockets
>through some sort of magic he pulls out a massive chest and throws it and it crushes the captain of the guard
>the chest springs open to revel hundred of thousands of septims
>the guards immediately stop
>stare at us both
>"you are free to go"
>the nord and i leave the city together and we arrive at a crossroad
>he pats me on the shoulder and walks away waving
>im left standing alone in the middle of nowehere
>decide to move to the mountains and make a small farm
>occasionally i see an explosion in the distance and i shudder but its always nice and quiet
>can live the rest of my life comfortably with the pouch i was given
>everythingwentbetterthanexpected.wallpainting
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Dicknose
Whatever happens, happens.
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